If I were a car I’d run purely on gas (as a by-product of wheat), which, while being fairly cheap, would mean that I might lack power at times, struggling up the steep hills. The head gasket would need careful attention as I’d be prone to over-heating, especially on family holidays (more of that another time) and we all know that a blown head gasket can be costly, for all. My indicators would be a little unreliable, rendering other road users frustrated at having to guess which direction I’m going in, and stunned as I make sudden u-turns.

If I were a car my mirrors would always sparkle, affording a clear reflection to help guide decision making, but also allowing a guilty view of the grimy back windscreen. My tyres would require regular rotation as I wear through the rubber with poor control over the brakes, at times attempting to accelerate and brake simultaneously.

If I were a car my performance would rely on regular tuning and oil changes, and even some dormant periods in a dark garage, to rest and ensure longevity.

Oh, and I like to think that I’d be that first car that, whilst being a little dorky, is reliable and able to provide many a sweet memory.

It came about during a re-cap of my stay-at-home-with-a-newborn day (needless to say, the tale was brief, predictable and rather dull). On this particular day I chose to seek my husband’s sympathy by whinging about having to get our sleeping baby in and out of the car at my big boy’s child care drop-off/pick-up, potentially turning a chunk of the day into a settling nightmare. ‘Why don’t you just leave him in the car while you go in?’, my husband suggested.

My eyes widened in horror and our conversation proceeded as such:

‘Are you serious?! Leave the baby in the car?!!’

‘Yeah, why not? You’d lock it of course.’

‘But what if someone stole him?’

‘The car’s locked.’

‘What if he broke in and drove off in the car with the baby in the back? It happens you know!’

‘Who’s going to do that at a child care place?’

‘Someone…I don’t know. It just wouldn’t be right. What sort of a parent leaves their baby in a car unattended?’

‘You wouldn’t be long.’

And so it continued. On the weekend the scenario shifted to the petrol station and this time it was my brother-in-law insisting that a baby alone in a car at the petrol station was okay. My sister backed me up (under duress, perhaps…).

‘You can’t do that!’ I shrieked. ‘Someone could report you!’

My momentum was waning but I plowed on.

‘It just isn’t right. I would feel soooo guilty.’

‘No need. He’d be fine.’

‘How do you know?’

Etcetera, etcetera…

It made me wonder what other people think about the ‘kids in cars’ issue. You see, my perspective is loaded with Mother Guilt, anxiety and paranoia. My husband and brother-in-law’s opinion is, well, male. Laid-back male. What do you think?