Breast is best, according to the experts, but gee it would be nice to have the power to transfer these breasts of mine to someone else for a day.
I am breastfeeding and proud of it. Proud in the knowledge that my breasts alone are able to sustain another human life. Proud that I am boosting my child’s health, present and future. Proud that this feeding has facilitated my recovery from pregnancy and birth (though the effectiveness of breastfeeding in vanishing stretch marks is yet to be demonstrated). But most of all I am proud that I am managing to make myself available to this child 24 hours a day, 7 days a week…ALL THE TIME. I’m on-call, on alert, on demand.
Proud, but somewhat resentful. Can’t I just have a wee break? I wasn’t feeling quite so disgruntled until recently, when a fellow mummy sighed, citing new parent fatigue. I nodded enthusiastically and released a mammoth sigh of my own, setting myself up for a whinge about breastfeeding on demand and the broken sleep and limited independence it necessitated. That discussion never eventuated because my conversation partner went on to state that her baby fed like clockwork, every four hours, and that, with the assistance of her husband, she was able to sleep from 9pm til 4am. I was dumbfounded and insanely jealous. Her trick? Bottle feeding.
My breast pride melted away and I felt cheated. Why couldn’t I get that much sleep? Why couldn’t I just up and leave the house, not having to worry about being back within two hours in case my udder was required or requested? And remind me, why, why did I choose to breastfeed? Oh, that’s right, the health benefits, the cost benefits, the convenience. Convenience? I’ll tell you what would be convenient – to give my breasts to someone else for a day and get some rest!
I hadn’t really appreciated how physically and emotionally draining breastfeeding can be. It is a sacrifice, a selfless gift to my child. So to all breastfeeding women out there, charge your glasses. Here’s to us leaking, lumpy, squirty, sleepy dairy cattle. Three cheers! Cue chink of glasses and, of course, spilt milk.
Hi Pen,
Site looks good, great effort getting new site and articles done with your lack of sleep & breastfeeding! Definetley one thing I don’t miss about babies!! Take care, Cath x
I can completely understand the tiredness that comes from breast feeding, my youngest is 18 months and I am still breast feeding him every morning when he wakes up at 5am.
I don’t agree that the difference is bottle vs breast though. I think it is baby temperament and parenting. All my babies have been different in terms of feeding and sleeping. My first born had the most fantastic routine from 12 weeks – breast fed every hours (both breasts) slept for two hours at a time during the day and slept from 9pm until 6.30am consistently. My number two however was so opposite. He only like to have one breast at a time, didn’t really develop a routine until after 6 months and didn’t sleep through until 7 months. His day sleeps were only cat naps until about 7 months too.
Breast feeding can be exhausting, but as you said it is certainly worth the benefits!