You can’t choose your family and unfortunately you can’t choose your children’s friends either.
Impressionable sponges, they are, and not selective. He brings home all manner of sayings, noises and attitudes, dumping them in our laps and slapping them in our faces each day. He tries them out like new toys, seeing which one gives him the biggest thrill and achieves the most hearty of reactions from us. I know a lot of words and actions are the consequence of copycatting, because I see them expertly modelled by other children at the drop off and pick up times, from the grating ‘nah-nah-nah-nah-nah’ and screwed up face that comes with it, to the blatant ignoring of adult direction.
We talk about doing the right thing, playing nicely and being your own person – ‘Don’t copy what so-and-so does/says – you do the right thing. You’re a friendly/gentle/good boy, aren’t you?’ Aren’t you? AREN’T YOU? My god, what if our son is the evil one, spreading irritating and bad habits throughout the playground, encouraging evil rebellion in the other kids? What if ours is not the innocent victim of sponging?
As his mum, of course I refuse to believe that at any level, beyond a fleeting consideration. I’ll continue to gently instill/forcibly ram the ‘right thing’ messages into his little being and cross my fingers that, as he grows and matures, he makes good choices for himself. I know we can’t choose his friends…but it’d be nice, wouldn’t it?
